To help you understand this process - a shortened version of a response is below.

This is not the full question nor the full response.

Letter: Living with Rage in a Relationship

*The Question

Questions are submitted (anonymously or named) and receive a response from the Firekeeper. The Firekeeper listens beyond the pain and beyond the wounds, feeling for ancestral wisdom and reaching for the spirit beneath the words. Responses are NOT clinical advice they are reflections rooted in love, guided by spirit and shaped by collective experience.

“I’m in a relationship with someone whose rages are becoming worse. They dismiss my feelings and excuse their behaviour. Is it too late for them to change?”

*The Firekeeper Responds

No matter someone’s age, healing is possible — but only if they truly choose it. It is not your task to carry the weight of another’s unresolved pain, nor to wait indefinitely for change that may never come.

Love that harms is not love.

No diagnosis, label, or life story erases the need for someone to take accountability for their behaviour.

Ask yourself: What is the cost to my spirit if I remain here? What is the possibility for my life if I do not stay?

*Ancestral Trauma

The storm you are living with may also carry echoes of older storms. Many of our ancestors, stripped of power and control, carried their pain as anger — sometimes turned inward, sometimes spilling onto those closest to them. Rage became a language of survival, even when it harmed the ones they loved the most.

What you are facing may be more than just your partner’s alone; it may be the echo of a generational wound. Recognising this does not excuse their behaviour, but it can help you see that the cycle is old — and it can end with you refusing to carry it further.

*Ritual Offering

When you feel the weight of their rage pressing on you, place both hands on your stomach and whisper: “This is not mine to hold.” Breathe deeply, imagining their fire leaving your body. Repeat until you feel lighter. This simple act protects your spirit from absorbing what is not yours.

*Reflection to Take With You

You cannot make someone ready for healing.

You can, however, choose your own liberation.

*Proverb: “Ancestors say”:

“Even if the storm rages, you may still choose to step out from under its clouds.”

Each letter is held with deep ancestral care, spiritual tending, time and energy. Responses are not casual advice, they are ancestrally aligned responses to ‘guide’ you.

LETTERS AROUND THE FIRE IS OFFERED AS A SACRED EXCHANGE

📌 A ONE-TIME sacred exchange of £40.

If you do not feel called to make an offering at this time, the fire will still hold you in its light. You are welcome to return here when the moment feels right.

TO MAKE YOUR ONE-TIME SACRED EXCHANGE OF £40 click below

➡️ [May Your Generosity Be a Blessing On Your Lineage]